Crafts and Cleanse?

Hello Blogofriends!
I know, I know.  I've been completely AWOL lately.  I told you that Nutcracker consumes my life from about November until December, but you didn't believe me did you?  Then it takes me at least three weeks to recover from all the tutus and tears.  Well, now all of a sudden it's January and there's really no excuse for such a long absence.

My favorite image taken from this year's Nutcracker.
Photo: John Sullivan

The other lame excuse I have for not posting is that I am currently attempting to do a detoxifying cleanse.  I've done cleanses before but this one is hardcore.  Here are just some of the things I cannot eat:
Meat
Dairy
Eggs
Refined Sugar
SALT
Wheat
Rice
Soy
Beans
Legumes
SALT
Black or white pepper
Oats
SALT

Did I mention salt?

You know, it's going to take a lot less time telling you what I actually can eat rather than what I can't.  Here goes:
Fruits, any kind
Vegetables, any kind
Herbs and spices (except SALT)
Sunflower seeds and almonds (soaked)
Potatoes (no more than 3x/week)
Quinoa (no more than 3x/week)

And that's about it.  If you thought that was bad, I also have to choke down this disgusting shake of food-grade clay and fiber three times a day. 

I really won't go into the icky details with you right now.  Suffice it to say that I'm in foodie hell but it really is a hell of my own making.  I've been abusing my digestive system for a while now and this fall it finally fought back.  I was so out of kilter that pretty much every time I ate I'd get an upset stomach and all the wonderful things that go with that.  I decided to do something drastic and my good friend had recently done this particular cleanse with much success.  I'm hoping it will get me back on track and able to indulge in all things baked, broiled, fried and SALTED.  I really want to weep for lack of salt, dear readers.  What is the point of life?  I think I'm going to go out and get that book Salt today.  I completely understand why people have fought and died over it.  Did you know that people used to get paid in salt?  Hence the word "salary". 

So it looks like there will probably be more craft posts rather than nom posts for the time being. You really don't want to know what I'm eating.  Has anyone else ever done a cleanse?  Was it worth it?  God, I hope so.

Byeeeee!